The Final Five Theater Experiences I Had Before They All Went Away (Very Sad)

So, I don't know if you've heard, but there's this virus thing going around. And not only is it potentially lethal, it's also  messing with my movie-watching vis-à-vis shutting down all the theaters. So if you're reading this, Covid-19... back the hell off! What you're doing here, it's not cool. Staying home from school and … Continue reading The Final Five Theater Experiences I Had Before They All Went Away (Very Sad)

Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) – Movie Review

Uh oh! I've started to like DC movies more than Marvel movies! I've always liked the DC comics better, but they've gotten their ass whooped when it comes to movies over the last decade. But now we've had a streak of four great DC movies in a row, none of which are like any of … Continue reading Birds of Prey (And the Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn) – Movie Review

MovieMort’s Academy Awards 2020: What The Oscar Nominations Would Look Like If They Were Correct

I've seen 119 movies that came out in 2019. Here are my Oscar Nominations. The real Oscars are tonight, but they got it completely wrong because it wasn't exactly my picks. Disgusting. My winners are bold, and my runnerups are slanty boys. BEST PICTURE I Lost My Body Jojo Rabbit Joker Little Women Marriage Story Once … Continue reading MovieMort’s Academy Awards 2020: What The Oscar Nominations Would Look Like If They Were Correct

HBO’s Watchmen: Series Review

This show is ballsy. Not because of the amount of balls you see, or the dope risks it takes with its story, or even its fascinating and layered political statements, Watchmen is ballsy because of how un-ballsy it seems at first. Somebody could watch the first few episodes and assume that it’s just a pretty … Continue reading HBO’s Watchmen: Series Review

Joker – Quick Thoughts

When I first saw Joker, I thought it was a excellent. But after seeing it for a second and third time... it's a MASTAPEEEECE LADIES AND GENTLEMAN! You heard me right. A MASTAPEEEECE. Joaquin Phoenix's performance is masterful and Oscar-Worthy, Todd Phillips' directing is meticulous and powerful, the story is woven in such a way … Continue reading Joker – Quick Thoughts

Spider-Man: Far From Home – Quick Thoughts

I don't like writing stuff about Marvel movies. What is there to say? Far From Home was great! It's a well crafted and fun movie that treats the source material with care. The Mysterio mindfreak scene is perfection. When that sequence was over, my friend and I let out an audible "Awww." I wanted more, … Continue reading Spider-Man: Far From Home – Quick Thoughts